It’s never been a good sign of getting a cold shoulder from someone that you love very deeply. People give a cold shoulder for a number of reasons; it could be dis-likeness, upset, hurt, or something else. However, if you’re on the side of being ignored, then what you should do. Today, we’ll discuss how to deal with being ignored by someone you love; the impact of being ignored, and some of the frequently asked questions.
How to deal with being ignored by someone you love
It’s time to discuss how to deal with being ignored by someone you love. You should break the ice and have a productive talk with the person you love. Here’s how you should do it;
Reach out to the person
If you have a feeling of being ignored, then you shouldn’t waste time and wait for them to talk to you. Instead, you should call or text him/her and reach out. You can start by saying “I’ve been observing a distance between us, if you have got some time, then we can talk.”
If someone is intentionally keeping a distance from you, then it’s possible one won’t respond to you immediately. You should give him/her some time to get back to you.
Contact again if you don’t hear back
If you hear back from your loved one in the next few days, then you should send another text to make sure whether they’ve received their first text or not, or everything is alright there. After the second reminder message, then you should wait.
You can the second message by saying “hey there, I haven’t received any replying from, I’m texting because I want to work things out between us. Do you sometimes at the weekend to have a cup of tea/coffee”?
You can also send a compassionate reminder message by saying “you care about him/her and the connection you have with that person. You won’t give up the fight, and wait for the loved one.”
Listen to him/her
If you want to fix things up, then you should give your partner a chance to speak and share their thoughts without any disruption. While doing so, it doesn’t mean that you have to agree with everything he/she is saying. If you have concerns, then you should carefully share your thoughts because it’s important in the long term.
You can break the ice by saying “it seems like you have been intentionally giving me a cold shoulder. May I ask what is going on?”
Acknowledge their feelings
One of the common reasons for avoiding is when you got into a fight and you’ve hurt your loved one unintentionally. If that’s the case, then you should let him/her know that you understand why your loved one is upset. It means that you acknowledge his/her feelings.
You can start the discussion by saying “I know not talking to you at the party was wrong, and I understand that it has made you feel upset.”
Respect your loved ones
When someone avoids you, then it’s difficult to go through such a phase and it makes you mad. However, when you get the chance to talk to your loved one, then you should respectfully talk and listen. You should avoid lashing out only because you’re upset and feeling bad.
For instance, a child is ignoring you, he can’t exactly share his feelings in words, but his way of saying that you don’t respect his feelings.
Share your feelings
If your loved one is avoiding you, then you should honestly share your feelings and let him/her know that how the distance made you feel. While doing so, you should avoid making your loved one feel guilty.
For instance, you can say “when you were avoiding me, it made me feel so bad. I was feeling that I was going to lose you.”
Say what you plan to do
If your loved one is ignoring you, then it means that he/she is really upset and feeling bad, and looking for an apology from you. You should suggest few things in order to make it up for him/her. For instance, you can say “I truly apologize that I’ve hurt your feelings before moving forward. I’m willing to make up for it.”
Ask him/her to talk again
You should tell your loved one that ignoring and keeping a distance is not the way to solve the problem. Next time, if it happens, then you should consider talking rather than keeping a distance. For instance, you can say “I know you’re feeling upset and hurt, and you have made your point. Next time, you should tell me on my face.”
Talk to yourself
The most important thing that you should remember is that you have complete control over your life. You aren’t sure whether your loved one would keep on avoiding you or not in the future. However, if it happens again, then your focus should be on yourself and stop making up for it every time.
You should remember the fact of not avoiding the person you love. If your loved one keeps on avoiding you over and over again, then you should go back and re-evaluate your whole relationship.
Get professional support if needed
If your loved one is not talking to you and avoiding you over and over again, then you should reach out to a therapist or counselor. Your shrink would help you to evaluate your relationship and guide you on why it’s happening to you in the relationship.
How to deal with being ignored by someone in a relationship
It’s equally upsetting when your partner/spouse/couple avoids you in the relationship. When it happens, then you start doubting yourself and the whole foundation of the relationship. You may feel that your partner is taking you for granted. That’s why it’s significant to carefully deal with the whole situation. Some of the tips and suggestions on how to deal with being ignored by someone you love in the relationship are as follows;
I won’t say that stepping back is the shrewdest step, but it’s the most effective one. You should respect the decision of your partner and carefully communicate. But you don’t have to be needy and jeopardize your self-esteem.
When your partner avoids you, then give him/her a clear indication that you’re willing to correct things up in the relationship. After that, you should give your partner space to figure things and come to you, and recognize the fact that it was a mistake to avoid you.
Distract your mind
There are many instances where people have had panic attacks, depression, and anxiety because their partner started avoiding them. The lesson is when your partner that you love avoids you, and then you should give yourself space from the relationship and do something that you’re passionate about. The distraction could be in the form of taking painting classes, doing yoga, or dance classes.
Accompany those who make you happy
The avoidance and distancing usually come from the people that make you happy, and it’s not easy to go through such a phase. When it happens, then you accompany those people that are near to you. However, when your partner is avoiding you and you’re spending time in isolation, then the depth of darkness would multiply. Therefore, you should spend a lot of time with your friends and close people that make you happy.
You shouldn’t be too hard on yourself and ask for the approval of other people. You should appreciate yourself and become your biggest fan. The smile, laughter, and positivity are contagious and you should prove it with your actions. When you’re happy and joyful, then your partner would love to be with you again.
Break the cycle
Sometimes people avoid you to get some type of reaction from you. When you lash out, fight, and rage, then you give them exactly when they’re looking for. Therefore, you should play smart and break the cycle of manipulation, and don’t give what they want. Sometimes, you have to reply to the silence with silence and make them realize your worth.
Impact of being ignored
Many psychologists and mental health professionals consider distancing and avoiding your partner falls under the category of manipulation and emotional abuse. It can cause depression, anxiety, panic, anger, and low self-esteem. The impact of consistently being ignored could lead to physical health issues like muscular tension, high heartbeat, headaches, insomnia, and others.
Some of the other symptoms of stress due to being ignored are compromised immune system, diabetes, digestive problem, headache, higher blood pressure, etc. if the partners have a stronger love bond, then the physical and psychological impacts would be stronger.
Some of the frequently asked questions relevant to how to deal with being ignored by someone you love are as follows;
Is being ignored mean a “sign of love”?
No, absolutely not. It has never been an easy sign of love when someone you love avoids you. In fact, a consistency of being left out and avoided in the relationship isn’t good for your emotional health in the long term.
Is being ignored mean a “sign of manipulation”?
When someone purposefully avoids you in order to get some type of reaction out of you, then yes, it can be manipulative. It depends on the type of relationship you have with your partner and the consistency of being ignored.
How should you respond when being ignored?
First of all, you have to find out the reason for being avoided. You should make sure that your partner isn’t busy or doing it unintentionally. You should distract your mind, surround yourself with positive people, be happy and joyful, and get some professional support if things aggravate.
Conclusion: How to deal with being ignored by someone you love
After an in-depth study of how to deal with being ignored by someone you love, the impact of being ignored, and FAQs, we’ve concluded that being ignored in the relationship isn’t good for your emotional and psychological health. If you are going through such being avoided phase, then you should follow and practice the abovementioned suggestions.
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