People get into the relationship in order to live a happy life and satisfy each others’ needs and build new memories. No one wants to be involved in a toxic and unhealthy relationship. However, things don’t happen in life as you planned, and the relationship you thought happy turned out to be toxic. Today, we’ll discuss how to leave a toxic relationship and offer you a step-by-step guide.
A toxic relationship has a devastating impact on mental and physical health and well-being. It’s because we put so much time, effort, and energy into establishing a romantic relationship. When it goes well, then we’re happy. However, when it doesn’t go as planned, then it negatively impacts your happiness and health.
On the surface, it’s easy to say that that relationship. But things are not as they seem in the relationship and they’re folded in many layers of romance and infatuation. That’s why it’s difficult to identify a toxic relationship when you’re in the relationship.
Warning Signs/How to leave a toxic relationship
In learning how to leave a toxic relationship, first of all, you have to recognize some of the warning signs. Different people have different natures and different definitions of a toxic and abusive relationships. However, what is toxic to me would be a normal thing to the other person. That’s why it’s significant that you should recognize the right traits of a toxic relationship. Some of the main warning signs and red flags are as follows;
Walking on Eggshell
Your partner has a very unpredictable nature and he/she gets offended by little things. His/her nature makes you so cautious that you start tracking your words, what and how you’re saying it, and when you should say it so that you don’t mess things up.
Investing a lot & Getting None
When we talk about healthy relationships, then they’re dual-sided. It means the time, energy, emotions, and feelings you’re putting into the relationship, the other partner acknowledges it and responds the same way.
Unhealthy and toxic relations are one-sided, where your partner has a competitive and jealous nature and doesn’t acknowledge your success and growth. It’s a very important warning sign.
Partner’s holding you back
If the relationship is healthy, then partners appreciate each others’ growth and success and promote them to become a better version of themselves. In an unhealthy relationship, your partner won’t appreciate your growth and success; he would become jealous and competitive, and discourage you from following your dreams.
One of the major signs of a toxic relationship is limited independence. Your partner keeps on texting and calling you in order to know your position and where you’re when you’re apart. In fact, your partner would go through your phone and read text messages. S/He has a controlling nature, would restrict your access, finances, and your social engagement.
Low Self-Worth in Relationship
When the relation is toxic and abusive, then it would reduce your self-worth to a great extent. If you have noticed the decrease in your self-worth, then you should check the role of your partner in it. Has he/she been ignoring, avoiding, disrespecting, judging, and criticizing you?
Next Step After Acknowledging Relationship as Toxic
You’ve been noticing the warning signs and realized that the relationship is toxic, and then you should gather help in order to get out of the relationship. It is better if you develop a step-by-step game plan for it. You should consult with a therapist if the situation is serious, and a good shrink would make sure your safety and work on restoring your self-worth.
If the problem is severe, then you should track a record of partners’ abusive behavior and get a restraining order if necessary. For instance, you have requested your partner not to contact you and leave you alone. But she/he has been texting, calling, and following you everywhere, and then it’s a solid ground for getting a restraining order. Some of the main steps in the game plan are as follows;
Talk to your partner
Whatever you have in your mind that is bothering you, you should discuss it with your partner. If your partner is open to it, then you should consult a therapist. You would receive emotional support at least. However, if the relationship and your partner end up doing the same thing repetitively, then you should finish the relationship.
Confide with your friends
If you’re planning to end the relationship, then you should confide it with your friends and family members. Make sure that you have a place to stay when you’ll break the relationship. The confided friends and family members in your social network would provide you emotional support and step up for you.
After breaking the relationship, next, you should focus on following your passion and do the things that you love doing it. Like dancing, exercising, walking, and spending time with appreciating friends and family members, such activities would assist you in building up your self-esteem.
You should start saving money as much as you can because all of it would help you when getting out of the relationship. If your partner threatens you and has violent behavior and s/he keeps a record of your movement, then you should file a restraining order against him/her. However, the restraining order is for your own safety, and it would restrict your partner from approaching you.
After ending the relationship, your happiness should be your top priority. The important thing that you should remind yourself of is that this relationship shouldn’t define you as a person. You should focus on establishing a healthy relationship in the future. Some of the suggestions for moving on are as follows;
Cutting Off all ties
If you stay in touch with your partner and keep talking back and forth after the breakup, then it would slow down your healing process. Sometimes, when you have children, then it becomes difficult to cut off all the ties. In such a case, your talk should be direct and limited, and discuss what is urgent, and don’t dwell on the past details.
A few months later, when both partners have been through the healing process, it’s probable that both partners may become friends. However, you shouldn’t befriend, flirt, or have sexual intercourse with your partner just right after the breakup.
Take Time to Heal
You should accompany those people that help you to rebuild your self-esteem and self-confidence, instead of talking with those people that would lower your energy. You should spend time with pet animals because they’re an excellent source of unconditional love. Such a type of unconditional love lifts up your spirit and energy. Nature is also a great place to find peace of mind and solace.
Develop New Passion
You should develop new hobbies and interests in your life. New interests not only help you build your self-confidence, but they also provide you an opportunity to expand your social network and meet new people.
Do Inner Work before getting into New Relationship
After getting out of the toxic relationship, you should give yourself time to heal. During this time, you should do the inner work and get to know yourself, and find out what you actually. The self-analysis allows you to be careful of your choices in terms of relationships in the future.
Conclusion: How to Leave a Toxic Relationship
After an in-depth study of how to leave a toxic relationship, we’ve realized that getting out of an abusive relationship is a challenge. First, you have to recognize and acknowledge the fact that the relationship is not good for you, develop a plan to leave, and then end it and focus on your healing process.
Ahsan is an accomplished researcher and has a deep insight in worldly life affairs. He goes Live 3 days a week on various social media platforms. Other than research writing, he’s a very interesting person.