Hollywood movies and social norms portray men as the sex maniac that commits infidelity. Many research studies have shown that the gender infidelity gap is decreasing especially among young people. Today, we’ll discuss the top reasons why do women cheat.
A study conducted by the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University found that there is no gender infidelity difference. Another study by GSS (General Social Survey) found that women aging 18-29 are more likely to commit infidelity than men. However, further data in the GSS report showed that the adultery rate of men is steady and the infidelity rate of women has increased by 40% from 1999 to 2010.
Experts explain that the shift in gender infidelity from men to women happened since women started working, making money, and choices in their life. Just like the concept of marriage used to mean financial support and capability and raising a family. Nowadays, the concept of marriage means best friends, good physical intimacy, and happiness.
Why Do Women Cheat? – Top Reasons
Let’s discuss the top reasons why do women cheat, and they’re as follows;
Numbing Difficult Emotions
When it comes to dealing with difficult emotions, people use a wide range of strategies that help them to numb their feelings and emotions and make it easier for them to face the situation. Alcohol, drugs, sex, and other compulsive behavior are the top numbing examples to manage their emotions.
Women get involved in the affair in order to escape from reality. When women want an ideal partner and they’re struggling with reality, they find escape in the world of fantasy. However, it helps them not only to numb their difficult feelings and emotions, but cheating also rushes adrenaline into their body.
Finding an Opportunity
There are a few cases of premeditated infidelity, but often it happens as a result of an unexpected opportunity. When they see a happy couple passing by, then they feel let down, and things go on from there. In this stage, people don’t know how to explain their affair, and they say things just happened. There are few moments of truth and reality that could make or break the relationship.
It’s similar in the world of social media and digital platforms; texting offers you an opportunity to connect with others. Things start innocently and they move from there.
Underlying Cause
According to relationship experts, infidelity and depression are the same things. An affair produces feelings of excitement, and your brain releases chemicals like serotonin, norepinephrine, and dopamine. When you have an attraction toward someone, then your brain releases such neurotransmitters. However, antidepressant medications produce the same type of chemicals. It means a woman committing adultery is medicating herself and finding refuge, and she doesn’t know the main reason behind her pleasure.
Midlife Crisis
Midlife crises occur usually at the age of 35 to 60. Any type of major life event could trigger midlife crises like a birthday milestone or the death of parents, and women struggle with the expectations of greatness. However, the socio-cultural environment pressurizes women to have everything in their life like loving children, husbands, successful careers, and so on. In such a state, they act irrationally and start taking the risk to make up for the lost opportunities.
Insecure Attachment Style
According to the attachment theory, our early childhood relationships impact our perception of how we should develop an intimate relationships when we grow up. It depends on the type of care and nurturing they have received while growing up. Usually, adults exhibit three main types of attachment styles;
- Secure (well-adjusted approaches and expectations to the relationship)
- Anxious (concerned about the fear of abandonment)
- Avoidant (preferring to maintain their independence from others)
Adults that have the avoidant and anxious attachment style, show traits that would disrupt their healthy romantic relationship. Such types of people would cheat by finding reassurance from the other person, or they would avoid the intimacy of their main relationship. They always struggle to find happiness in any relationship.
Loneliness
The husband and partner of some women work longer shifts and they leave them alone with kids. They’re in such a stage of life where they find it difficult to make friends or have a social life. However, it doesn’t matter whatever the reason is; disengagement from social life, feelings of isolation, and loneliness are the perfect recipe for an affair. They would welcome anyone that would meet their needs.
Sexual Deprivation
Excitement and a spark of connection would make the relationship last for a long time. Familiarity and predictability would overtake the quality of physical intimacy. However, some women miss the thrill and excitement that was present in the earlier stage of their relationship, and it fades away with the routine life. Historically speaking, men cheat because of this reason. Usually, it happens when sex doesn’t remain the main part of the relationship.
No Excitement
Some people are serial cheaters and they go on the cheating streak just for fun. They always look for new interactions to have excitement in their life. A study at AshleyMadison.com found that 67% of married women cheat on their husbands to find a passionate spark. Approximately 100% of the women claimed that they don’t have intentions of leaving their husbands.
Retribution or Anger
Some women idealize their relationships and partners in a certain way that they should behave and act in this way. When their partner doesn’t live up to their expectations or meet their demands, then it creates a divide in the relationship and pushes them away. However, some women commit infidelity as retaliation or anger, because they can’t bear the previous affair in their relationship.
Emotionally Hungry
Sexual desire is the main motive behind the infidelity of men, and women commit adultery to satisfy their emotional needs. Whether the affair is physical or emotional, women cheat to find the spark, connection, support, adoration, devotion, empathy, respect, and deep conversation.
Some people say that an emotional affair isn’t a real affair. It’s important to mention here that most sexual/physical affairs start with an emotional affair. It would be rare to find a physical affair that is not emotional. It starts with crossing the boundaries and then justifies the act.
Limited Self-Esteem
When women are experiencing low self-esteem issues in the relationship, they would look for attention from other sources that their partner is not giving to them. They ask themselves why people aren’t showing interest in them, and when someone does take interest in them, it makes them feel good. However, the affair helps them to validate their self-respect and value. When one fling or affair ends, they look for the other to find attention.
Dissatisfaction with Relationship
One of the main reasons behind cheating is feeling dissatisfied with their current partner or relationship. People justify their affair by saying that their relationship is going through a difficult patch, and their partner won’t care and it’s not a big deal. However, women justify their affairs to themselves before making any step.
Conclusion: Why Do Women Cheat? – Top Reasons
After an in-depth study of why do women cheat; its the top reasons; we have realized that women could cheat for any number of reasons. We have discussed some of the main reasons; if you think of something else, let us know in the comment box below.
Ahsan is an accomplished researcher and has a deep insight in worldly life affairs. He goes Live 3 days a week on various social media platforms. Other than research writing, he’s a very interesting person.
